a 57 year old at a pop concert
at my age
Last weekend i was on my way to the airport at five in the morning, flying to Montreal to see a concert, when one of the side windows from our jeep flew off and landed on the highway. It's a soft top, it happens.
Once we pulled over, I immediately jumped out and started quickly jogging down the highway to find it. I am a doer, and we had a flight to catch. With the help of my daughter's boyfriend, who chased after me, we were quickly and safely back in the jeep, with the window in my lap and resuming our drive.
My daughter was in shock I jumped out, it was dark in her defence, onto the highway at my age. AT MY AGE!! It's startling to hear. On one hand, you are happy for the concern, but on the other, I'm like what the fuck, I am not that old!!
Is 57 really that old in 2026? I am fit, I am normal weight, I don't look like a physically incapable person. I think she may have also been worried about my decision making choices with the traffic on the highway.
But either way, I am slowly realizing aging is so much bigger than I expected. Not the aging part. The assumptions part. A lot of judgement, not necessarily in a bad way, but a lot of assumptions about what i should or should not be doing.
the concert
We were headed to Montreal with my daughter, her boyfriend, and another young couple, to see a concert. For context my daughter is 36, the other couple in their early 30's.
Being invited to tag along was amazing and I was very much looking forward to it. But in the back of my head there were some lingering insecurities. Am I too old to go to a concert of a young pop artist?
I love concerts and have been to many! Music has always been a big part of my life and I keep current on new artists. Olivia Dean was the headliner, she sold out the Bell Centre! She is a young, beautiful pop star and so are her fans. I am thinking the average age of the fans were early 30 to mid 30s.
Her music is fantastic, and the concert was amazing but it was hard to relax, after all I could be most of the crowd's mother and I should behave as such. I literally felt badly for the 18 year old group of girls sitting beside me. Yes, I know that sounds crazy but that is how I felt.
If this would have been Blue Rodeo or Aerosmith I would have felt right at home singing loudly and enjoying myself. Did I have the right to act the same way at this concert? Probably, but it didn't feel right and I was worried about the perception of those around me.
Is 57 too old to care about what others think? Most definitely. But it's more about what I think about myself, and I haven't figured it out yet.
what to wear?
Aside from what to wear to the concert, I struggle with this whenever I am going out for the evening. And the age old question, what am I going to wear?
I am trying to find the balance of dressing my age, whatever that is, and feeling attractive. It's a mind fuck.
I don't want to dress like an old conservative woman but I don't want to dress like a 20- or 30-something either. My goal is not to look younger, I am ok with 57, but how do I dress to still feel attractive?
And when does not worrying about being attractive go away. Does it ever?
I want my husband to think I look hot. Is this crazy? It feels crazy! When I was even in my 40's dressing to be hot is still very acceptable, so why does it feel off limits to me at 57?
the truth of the matter
The reality is there is no blueprint for aging. I know some may struggle with turning 30 or 40 but in reality, it's not the same. Ya maybe you realize you are not a child anymore but society knows you are still young, you know you are hitting your stride and life is unfolding, but the reality is just different as you near 60.
I don't have it figured out. Sure I have some questions, struggle with the transition, but I guess that's part of the wonderful journey of having the privilege of growing older.
Karen
PS - I highly recommend seeing Olivia Dean in concert! Her performance along with her die hard fans, gave Swiftie or Adele vibes. Maybe one of my favourite concerts of all time.